Read and Reviewed: December 2012

51.  Dying Thoughts by Richard Baxter

Baxter discusses dying and the hope of heaven as he explains God’s promises, and reasons why it is better to depart and be with Christ.  Conversing with God, his reader, and his own soul, Dying Thoughts is certainly an uncommon read.

 

52.  Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus by Nancy Guthrie

This is a collection of Christmas readings by twenty-two different authors, both from long ago as well as contemporary, bound to enrich your Christmas season.

 

One year, fifty-two books, 37 authors.

Godspeed.

-julie

Read and Reviewed: November 2012

50.  Shepherding A Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp

The first half of the book discusses godly parenting principals, and the second half explains the technique and examples of how to do that through different age groups.  An insightful read.

Read and Reviewed: October 2012

46.  Blaggard’s Moon by George Bryan Polivka

A tale well told of pirates and their ships; of good and evil; of greed and sacrifice; and of love and destiny.  Delaney, a pirate facing sure death on a post in the middle of a pond where flesh-eating sea creatures make their home, rehearses the story in his mind.  Although novels are not my normal choice, and stories of pirates even less so, I truly enjoyed this page-turner as each part of the story unfolded and then came together into one.

47.  The Explicit Gospel by Matt Chandler

The Explicit Gospel is written in a fresh way explaining the straightforward gospel of Jesus.  Chandler discusses what he terms the gospel ‘on the ground’ and ‘in the air,’ which is to say both the work of Christ on the cross, and the way that event affects the entire universe.  He then shows that if the way we view the gospel is unbalanced toward either side that the outcome will be less than what the good news really is as it relates to both a personal relationship with Jesus, and to a global mission.  Lest the gospel be forgotten, the reader is challenged to approach daily life making it explicit, and not simply assumed.

48.  Battling Unbelief by John Piper

I did not realize it when I bought this book; this is the compilation of the application chapters of The Purifying Power of Living by Faith in Future Grace.  I commend Future Grace to you over Battling Unbelief.  Future Grace gives the foundation and doctrine behind what is re-printed in Battling Unbelief.  This little book encourages the reader to fight for faith in future grace and not only look backward to past grace in the cross as he wars against specific sin.

49.  Church Membership by Jonathan Leeman

A short little book that is bound to change your perspective of what church membership is, and how it is practiced.  Practical, interesting, and packed with Scripture references, I enjoyed this book, and was challenged by its content.

Read and Reviewed: September 2012

37.  The Path Of Loneliness by Elisabeth Elliot

Elisabeth Elliot’s own story of loneliness weaves its way through the pages of this book as she proposes a challenge to see singleness as a gift, and to offer the loneliness back to God.  Divorce, marriage, singleness, and widowhood can all be lonely seasons of life, and each are addressed.  All while affirming the pain of being alone, Elliot encourages readers to find contentment and peace in Christ and to find joy in prayerful solitude.

38.  Love Or Die by Alexander Strauch

Beginning with the words, “You have abandoned the love you had at first,” from Revelation, Strauch examines what love is within the church Body both toward one another and toward God, and how it is carried out practically.  It is altogether convicting, practical, and overwhelming.

39.  Holiness by J. C. Ryle

I read this classic in three days, but I recommend you take three weeks so that less content flies over your head because of your haste.  I love Ryle’s writing style, depth of content, perspective of faith, and love of Christ and His Church within this book.  Each of twenty chapters nearly stands alone on separate subjects so I won’t attempt to summarize.  In nearly every chapter, Ryle seeks to persuade the unbeliever to turn to Christ, and applies doctrine practically to the Christian.

40.  Willing To Believe by R. C. Sproul
A book far too intellectual for me to grasp in full.  Using the works of several leaders in the reformation era and beyond, Sproul defends a case for the doctrine of monergistic regeneration, and shows the inseparable connection among regeneration, original sin, and free will.  A brilliant work in which the reader feels taught by Calvin, Luther, Arminius and others as Sproul integrates their writings into his own.

41.  Of The Mortification Of Sin In Believers by John Owen
Owen urges believers to see sin in its full ugliness, and then to kill it as they are obedient to the Spirit working this out in their lives daily.  The life and peace of the Christian is dependent on it.  For me, I read and re-read sentences and paragraphs in order to understand the content.  Deep and rich, but a hard read.

42.  Of Temptation: The Nature And Power Of It by John Owen
Owen is surely hard to read, but I enjoyed this one.  He discusses the reasons for temptation, how to fight it, what to look out for, and specifically explains how to ‘watch and pray’ as to not fall into temptation.

43.  The Nature, Power, Deceit, And Prevalency Of The Remainders Of Indwelling Sin In Believers by John Owen
As seems the norm with Owen, read it with an Advil and a dictionary close at hand.  An interpreter would help too.  Since I didn’t have any of these things I’m afraid I know very little of the aim of this book beyond the summary given in the title.  (But since I spent hours reading words over and over, I decided to still count it in my quest of fifty-two books this year!)

44.  Killing Calvinism by Greg Dutcher
Dutcher unpacks eight ways that Calvinists wreck their own reputation and theology.  Little passionate pursuit of evangelism, being taught by only Reformed teachers, and arrogance are a few.  Blunt, true to life, and convicting.

45.  Feminine Threads by Diana Lynn Severance
A textbook on women from Bible times to the present with great faith and character.  It is full of history and quotations from the writings of the women Severence highlights and those around them.  With a better knowledge of history than I have, and several less women portrayed at more length, this book could be enjoyable.

Read and Reviewed: August 2012

31. Sex Is Not The Problem (Lust Is) by Joshua Harris
Refreshing in comparison to the last book, I’ll recommend this one to you. I am afraid I have read far too many books about sexual purity in order to be fair; they just don’t seem to all say the same thing. Harris’ book is well written and focuses mainly on fighting lust instead of boundaries in dating and other usual chapters to read in these books.

32. SHE by Rebecca St. James and Lynda Hunter Bjorklund
A book scattered with numerous topics, this book covered everything from sexual purity to beautiful femininity, from the importance of mentoring relationships to living on purpose within boundaries. Throughout, the stories of women in the Bible are highlighted and retold. It attempts to define what a healthy woman of God looks like. I didn’t find this book helpful, but it wasn’t awful either.

33. And The Bride Wore White by Dannah Gresh
The subtitle of this book is, “Seven Secrets to Sexual Purity.” I have no idea what the author thinks those seven secrets are, although I’m sure I could find them in the table of contents. Regardless, reading this book was more like a long heart to heart talk over a cup of hot chocolate, written to a younger audience than myself. Gresh tells her story and encourages the reader through it and through Scripture to make a relationship with Jesus Christ priority as one seeks to act purely in dating relationships. And The Bride Wore White is unique among its kind.

34. Do You Think I’m Beautiful? by Angela Thomas
It’s in the heart of a woman to know if she is beautiful. Oftentimes she goes looking for the answer in the wrong places, and in my opinion this book is not the place either. Angela Thomas tells women they are beautiful because of the way God makes much of them as she quotes from Psalms and Song of Songs. It focuses on throwing off fear and choosing to try to dance an intimate relationship with God into being. Thomas uses several substitutes for profanity, and several ellipses in each chapter leave the reader wondering if the author knows how to complete her own thoughts.

*End of purity and femininity books! Back to a more normal reading list.

35. The Cross by Peter Jeffery
Jeffery uses a simplistic writing style to tell the story of the cross, tracing the prophecies of the Old Testament and discussing the accounts in the gospels. It is nothing out of the ordinary. Reading about Jesus’ last moments and resurrection three days later from the gospels themselves is far richer. Sadly, Jeffery hardly mentions the resurrection, is often repetitive, and takes few words to connect the event of the cross to everyday life despite the subtitle, "The Reality of the Cross for Today."

36. The Doctrine Of Repentance by Thomas Watson
Written originally in 1668, The Doctrine of Repentance is rich in both vocabulary and rhetoric. Watson discusses six character traits of true repentance in full detail, especially focusing on sorrowing over sin. Some other topics within this little book include why we should repent, a warning not to trust in our own repentance but in Christ’s work on the cross to cover our sin, and encouragement to live a life of daily repentance. It made me pause to contemplate as I read. Not a read leading to a happy, light spirit, but a necessary one, I think, regardless.

A Tribute: The Schroeders

Once again I have said another goodbye. This time to the family I have nannied for over the past year on Fridays. I'm only there once a week, but it's been a fun adventure. Jacob and Sophia have tons of energy. They love running after one another, playing chase. Pretending to go grocery shopping and making food in their little kitchen is another favorite. Every week we went on long walks around the neighborhood and talked about all the birds and dogs we would see. I've watched them since they turned one and now they're almost two so there have been lots of fun moments as they've learned single words and then put those words into two and three word sentences! I enjoyed the chance to love these little ones on Fridays!

Read and Reviewed: July 2012

28. God Is The Gospel by John Piper
Love this book. It was my second time reading it, and I kept my highlighter close by. In its pages, Piper unveils how each good gift that comes from the gospel really points to the ultimate gift of the gospel, God Himself. It challenges the ‘prosperity gospel,’ and, I think, American Christian culture in general.

29. Weird by Craig Groeschel
Groeschel says that normal isn’t working in American Christian culture, and challenges the reader to be different – weird –in a way that seeks to glorify God. He addresses the areas of time,
money, relationships, sex, and values. If you’re considering reading this book, I suggest Not A Fan by Kyle Idleman instead (Book #1). I read this at the beginning of my adventure of resolve to read a book a week and it has a similar premise as Weird, but, I think, is better written and more practical.

*Note: I previously worked for a small organization called Love180 as a secretary. As part of that job, I read many books about sexual purity. I was recently given a stack of more purity books, and so the next several books on my list will be in that category.

30. Soul Virgins by Doug Rosenau and Michael Todd Wilson
Please do not read this book. This one is now in the garbage because it is not fit for my bookshelf
and I will not pass it along to someone else. It is far worse than the typical Christian sexual abstinence book. As is typical, the authors attempt to coin some of their own phrases and terms and redefine words; there are plenty of stories about Tom and Jane, and Harry and Sally. More than that, this book has no specific practical helps; it is all generalizations, and the few boundaries it does propose are perilously close to what the authors call “true sex,” or
intercourse. Completely unhelpful practically, and liberal in belief and boundary, it’s not a book I’m recommending.

A Tribute: The Martins

My time working as a nanny for the Martins has come to a close, and I am setting out to write a blog of tribute to this family and these children who have so graciously spent the past year with me. From Megan refusing her bottle the first few weeks to these last months of climbing up the junge gym and going down the sliding board, I've loved watching Megan and Daniel grow into toddlers.

Daniel: Danny loves a good back rub or "spiders crawling up your back", and he laughs and laughs when the goosebumps come at the end of the ditty. He is always pleasant and playful. He loves wearing shoes and going out for a walk around the neighborhood or a trip to the playground. Dan would do all the motions with me to "Itsy Bitsy Spider," and always wanted me to sing it over and over.

Megan: Meg would leave what she was doing throughout the day to come give me a hug and sit in my lap for a few seconds. Her favorite word is "uh-oh!" Reading is one of her favorite activities and she would bring me book after book. She loves dress-up too, and each morning when I would bring clothes downstairs her excitement over getting dressed for the day was obvious.

I have so many memories of being with Meg and Danny - of teaching them "more" in sign language at mealtime; of Meg sleeping in the Moby Wrap; of Danny's sweaty head on my shoulder as we spent the last half of naptime on the couch together; of reading Fifteen Animals a hundred times a day; of pushing the double stroller around the neighborhood; of afternoons at the playground; of rolling balls across the floor, and pretending to drink out of teacups; of smacking my lips to Megan's laughter, and playing peek-a-boo with Daniel behind the rocker; of building towers and knocking them down. I thank God for the privilege of investing in their lives and for the opportunity to learn from being with them. It is a bittersweet goodbye.

Read and Reviewed: June 2012

25. Twelve Ordinary Men by John MacArthur
This book makes you feel like a fly on the wall, as you listen in to the time the disciples spent with Jesus. MacArthur devotes space to each of the twelve disciples, pointing out character traits and re-telling their stories. I enjoyed it, although do not care much for MacArthur’s writing style.

26. A Salty Piece Of Land by Jimmy Buffett
This novel was given to me to read otherwise I would have put it down on page three. It is the story of a Cowboy named Tully Mars who is running from the law with his horse, Mister Twain, and the people he meets along the way as well as the lighthouse he works to rebuild. It is a good story-telling for sure, but I would find it more enjoyable without the profanity, sex, drunkenness, and drugs.

27. The Pleasures Of God by John Piper
Two sentences I highlighted in this book: “In the end it will not be the seas or the mountains or the canyons or the water spiders or the clouds or the great galaxies that fill our hearts to breaking with wonder and fill our mouths with eternal praise. It will be God himself.” Now go read the rest of the book about God’s pleasure in being God because I cannot summarize well enough.

Read and Reviewed: May 2012

19. Transforming Grace by Jerry Bridges
Last year, I read The Discipline Of Grace which was written as a sequel to this book by Bridges. This book is 254 pages of defining grace, God’s unmerited favor to us. While I would highly recommend The Discipline of Grace, Transforming Grace was a long, slow read for me with a seemingly abundance of wasted space and words.

20. Forgiveness by Charles Stanley
Forgiveness is well-written, and a quick, easy read. It discusses in detail God’s forgiveness and how we are to forgive others and ourselves. It includes the steps involved with Scripture scattered throughout. Warnings of bitterness and a life lived without embracing forgiveness is also clearly shown.

21. A Gospel Primer For Christians by Milton Vincent
I was overwhelmed with the skill this book is written with and the depth of its content. Vincent gives thirty-one reasons why every Christian should preach the gospel to himself every day. Then, he proceeds to preach that gospel in both prose and poetry. Nearly every thought is footnoted with Scripture. Its style and effect are startling. It takes what is familiar and depicts it in a way that is fresh and colorful, the way stained glass can take something common and bring a different beauty. I am definitely recommending.

22. Be Still, My Soul by Nancy Guthrie
This book is a collection of sermons, writings, and excerpts from books from twenty-five different authors and speakers on the subject of suffering. Age old writings mingle with the contemporary to complete a perspective not many books bring. I look forward to reading Guthrie’s other collections.

23. Fifty Reasons Why Jesus Came To Die by John Piper
The title tells exactly what this book is. Piper says that asking who killed Jesus is not the question, but why he bled and died and rose again, and he gives fifty purposes from the New Testament. This little book is full of Scripture and well worth the read.

24. The Beginner’s Guide to Fasting by Elmer L. Towns
In this book, Towns explains the types and lengths of fasts, and the causes for carrying out a fast. I would not recommend this book. It is repetitive, and makes fasting seem like manipulation. He only briefly talks about it as a spiritual discipline. Not a book you’ll find on my shelf.

Read and Reviewed: April 2012

I may have only read three books this month, but I'm still one book ahead for the year so it's okay.

16. When I Don’t Desire God by John Piper
This book is for the tired heart, darkened by joylessness. Piper offers hope to the hopeless and explains the means to awaken joy in the cold heart. I took notes as I read, uncommon for me, and it drove me to the Word time and time again. This book challenged, taught, and encouraged me. I commend it to you.

17. The Book Of The Dun Cow by Walter Wangerin Jr.
A novel concerning a Rooster and his Coop. This is the story of this Rooster, Chauntecleer, and the goings on within his Coop, the fight against the evil Wyrm living within the earth, and a Dog with a large snout and a Dun Cow. Within its pages are good and evil, hate and forgiveness, and loving sacrifice. Read it for yourself. Your time will not be wasted.

18. When The Darkness Will Not Lift by John Piper
This is basically a short version of When I Don’t Desire God (see book #16) although the back cover does not tell you that. I recommend the longer version if you’re going to just read one. This one was a great reminder and a summary, and although you would not guess it from reading the back cover, seems to be written to the friend of the person walking in the darkness rather than that person himself.

A Tribute: The Bogners

My scheduled time working for Matt and Hope with their children, Kaylyn and Emily, has ended. I hope that although my weekly time with them is over that this is not goodbye. I write this as a tribute to this family as I look back and remember fondly my time with them.

Matt: Thanks for the help with my car when the battery died. You came and picked up my couches and stored them in your shed. You invited me to be a part of your family, and I am so incredibly grateful.

Hope: Our little texts back and forth each week about my schedule with my, "Yup" and your, "Yep." The car ride to Ocean City for you to speak at that conference, and Emi chipping her teeth on the coffee table at the hotel. Your home became my home too when I felt alone in a new city. Thank you for caring about my heart and not being soley professional. It was so needed and I appreciate your encouragement.

Kaylyn: I remember swinging butterfly style, you sitting on my lap, on the swings at the park. Doing cartwheels, and playing tag. Going for walks around the pond, and catching butterflies in the backyard. Making bracelets out of bandanas and flowers out of tissue paper. Being silly; telling stories; making dinner together. Playing volleyball with balloons in the living room. You teaching me how to play Headbandz and playing with my hair while Emi napped. You reading sections of your books to me. I love your caring, sweet heart, KK, and I thank you for making me a part of your family.

Emi: So many trips to parks and playgrounds and the library and Hands On House and Park City. Coloring. Playdoh. Candyland. I loved playing with rocks out on the porch for hours, your creativity inspiring me. Crafts. Games. Tag. Teaching me how to dance to music. Making meals. When I met you, your favorite word was, "Stuck," and now you have grown into a little princess. Thank you for loving me well.

There are so many, many memories. My heart is full. I am blessed to know you and work for you; to love and invest in your children. It was an honor and a priviledge. I thank God for you.

Read and Reviewed: March 2012

10. The Holiness of God by R.C. Sproul
Although other books I have read by Sproul have been like opening a textbook, this book was unlike his usual writing style – more like cracking his journal. Full of inspiration, stories,
doctrine, challenge, apologetics, and encouragement, I enjoyed this book immensely and learned much from it about what holiness means and how God manifests it to us.

11. Discipleship Counseling by Neil Anderson
I read this book for a small group. It goes along with a booklet the group is doing, “The Steps To Freedom In Christ”. I would say that this book definitely helped explain the reason behind said booklet, and gave clarity to the steps in it. Unless you’re planning to work through the steps, I’m not suggesting that you read this one, but it is certainly helpful to read in advance if you want to work through the booklet.

12. Restored by Neil Anderson
This book was another one I read for small group preparation. It is basically the shortened and condensed version of the second half of Discipleship Counseling (book #11), with the exact stories and wording in parts. A quick read, but if you’re going to go through the steps, I would suggest Discipleship Counseling over Restored.

13. Dug Down Deep by Joshua Harris
Dug Down Deep is the story-telling of Joshua Harris’ journey in faith while also digging into main doctrine of salvation. This book is engaging, and an easy, quick read; it will inspire and challenge; you will laugh and take time to ponder.

14. Putting Amazing Back Into Grace by Michael Horton
The title drew me in quickly, but the content lacked that same way of engagement. This is a book full of doctrine and teaching of the Reformed faith. The last few chapters go beyond the scope of the five points of Calvinism, and teach about baptism, communion, and eschatology. It was a long, slow read for me; it didn’t help that some of the last chapters I don’t agree with. I am not recommending it.

15. Freedom From Fear by Neil Anderson & Rich Miller
Once you have read one book by Neil Anderson, you have read them all, it seems. This is my third of his in the past month; I’m reading them for small group preparation. This one explains anxiety and panic and how to break free of it by fearing God instead.

Read and Reviewed: Feb 2012

6. Nine Marks Of A Healthy Church by Mark Dever
This book is nine chapters about what Mark Dever sees as the nine most forgotten facets in our present church culture for a healthy church. While I enjoyed reading all nine essays, I think the nine marks website, although more briefly, does a better job in explanation. (http://www.9marks.org)

7. All of Grace by C.H. Spurgeon
In All of Grace, Spurgeon pleads with the unbeliever to repent and believe. He explains the doctrine of grace, and discusses sin, faith, repentance, justification, forgiveness, and assurance of
salvation. Although a short work, it is of great depth and discusses doctrines plainly.

8. Living The Cross Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney
Mahaney walks the reader slowly and carefully through the gospel of Jesus. Then he gives practical ways to make that gospel a focus and reality in everyday life. Legalism, condemnation, and feelings centeredness are addressed and ways to escape these bondages are laid out. This book engages both one’s heart and mind.

9. The Grand Weaver by Ravi Zacharias
This book is overflowing with stories that ultimately point to a Sovereign God who is working through every event and happenstance in our lives. If you love a good story-telling that combines humor, inspiration, and intellect, this is the book for you!

Read and Reviewed: Jan 2012

As mentioned in last post, I plan to post my brief reviews of the books I am reading as part of my year's resolutions each month. Below are the books I have read in January.

1. Not A Fan by Kyle Idleman
Not a Fan challenges the reader to be more than just a fan of Jesus, but to be a follower; to not just go to church, have a Christian music ringtone on his cell phone, and be able to quote the Lord’s Prayer from memory, but to take up his cross and follow Jesus at any cost. Idleman poses practical questions about where, when, and what Jesus is calling His followers to do and to be that challenge and inspire. Although not very theological, it is motivational in nature, written simply, and the reader is bound to put the book down pondering his commitment to the words of Jesus.

2. Come Thirsty by Max Lucado
This book is full of stories of people seeking refreshment from Jesus, the Living Water. The questions for thought in the back of the book are helpful to connect the stories of each chapter with one’s own story. Although the book is a quick read and inspirational, reading only the first and last chapters would be sufficient for understanding the point of the entire book.

3. The Man Who Was Thursday by G. K. Chesterton
This novel tells the story of Gabriel Syme, a police detective, who goes undercover as a member of the anarchist council by the name of Thursday. Because of a vow he takes early on in the story, he cannot disclose his findings to the police. It follows his adventure running from the very group of people he is posing as, and fighting to stop the murder the council has agreed to carry out. Syme honors his vow of secrecy, but somehow finds comrades along the journey. This allegorical, suspense novel is a page turner, written in poetic detail. A joy to read.

4. Finally Alive by John Piper
Finally Alive tells the story of the born again believer. Piper explains what the new birth is, why it is important, how it comes about, what happens afterward, and how we can share it with other people. I thoroughly enjoyed the read; it brings a beautiful, fresh perspective to the gospel and salvation. It was an encouragement to my faith.

5. Slave by John MacArthur
MacArthur gives insight Biblically and historically into slavery and the paradox that it is for the believer. Explained within its pages is slavery to sin, being slaved by grace, going from slaves to sons in God’s eyes, and serving God as our Master. Deep, rich, and insightful, but not a difficult read. I would highly recommend.

2012 Resolutions

I have not blogged in months. There has truly been nothing noteworthy to say. I'm not sure anything I say is ever noteworthy, but today I will post my new year's resolutions.

Resolutions 2012

#1 My first resolution is financial. I will say little more specifically, except that I give God only what first comes from His hand. (1 Chronicles 29:14) I want to view all of my finances that way.

#2 To practice my femininity. This resolution has so many aspects.

Some of it is physical: being careful to wear modest clothing. I want to cover my head more often, and wear skirts more.

Some of it is in lifestyle: To be the one who sits on the floor when there aren't enough seats. To clean. To learn how to cook and bake exceptionally well (and without boxed food). To practice hostessing and hospitality. To let men be the man and be the lady when they open doors for me, or ask to carry my laundry, or whatever - to be the weaker instead of trying to be so independent and strong all the time. To learn more sewing techniques instead of just throwing fabric together and hoping it works. To learn and practice skills that will be useful in marriage and motherhood, especially at work as a nanny in nurturing, caring for, and training children. Doing good, especially in the community and neighborhood. Learning skills to be a homemaker. Being a good listener, and a good helper.

And some of it is inward: Cultivating a gentle and quiet spirit. Submitting to authority inwardly as well as outwardly. I’m sure the list could go on and on.

#3 To read 52 books this year (that's about 1 book a week). I plan to write a brief review of every book I read this year too so that I can keep them all straight in my head. I will hopefully post these once a month.

Be Happy

Happy has not been the word I would use to describe my life lately. In fact, tears are what have left their mark in the past few weeks, and wrinkled the paper as my pen poured my heart out in my leather journal. Just for fun, I bought a little book at Barnes & Noble called, Be Happy.

The first page says, "Show up."

Today, I laughed. Finally. All because I showed up.

Megan (one of the babies I watch) learned how to roll a ball today, and she couldn't stop laughing. She was so proud of herself, and amazed at the ball that she rolled across the floor over and over again. Every time she pushed it and the ball rolled, she laughed. Every time I pushed it back toward her, she laughed again. And I laughed too. Because the ball was all that mattered for a minute. Megan was all that mattered for a minute. And her laughter.

Drench

Outside my cracked open windows is hurricane Irene.
I wish her rains could find their way to my dry soul and drench.

Change of Pace

I work to live; I don't live to work. About a month ago, I began to wrestle with whether I wanted to keep working six days a week. While my bank account seems to require that I work, and I don't want to throw away the blessing of having a job, I long to have a whole weekend to be able to see friends, catch up on my life, run errands, read . . . just do what needs to be done and have fun too, and yet still have a sabbath. Have a day to rest and read and journal and be without the hustle.

One evening as I was driving and thinking this through, a song by JJ Heller came on my stereo, "When I Leave." One of the lines says, "It's time to count my blessings. Forget about my savings account for a while." Sighing with relief, I made my decision. Later, I had to re-work my budget to make this thing work. It's going to be tight, but I believe it is worth it. One day, I doubt I will look back at my life now, and wish that I had saved more, worked harder, worked longer.

Yesterday was my last day at the salon. I will miss doing hair, meeting so many interesting people, and my co-workers.

I want to dance. Dance even in the rain. Live simply, but live fully. I'm so very excited for this change of pace in my life, and the opportunity to be even more frugal, and re-examine my priorities, my heart, and my life.

"Look At Me"

I nanny for an amazing two year old, Emi. I don't have children of my own yet so in some ways I feel that I get to "practice" on the kiddos that I have the privilege of watching week after week. One thing I've learned is that if I cannot get a child's eyes and attention, I won't get her heart either; and when she is grown, I don't want her to only remember the rules I had, but I want her life and heart to be impacted by my investment. (This goes for all the kiddos, but this story is specifically about Emi.)

One day a couple weeks back, Emi finished coloring, and moved on to the toy box to find the next fun game we would play. I asked her if she was finished coloring. Without looking at me, she nodded her head. Then I asked her to pick up her crayons before she played with something else. I knew that she had heard me, but she was choosing not to listen and obey. I asked again. Then gently, "Em, look at me." Her head turned from the toy box, and her eyes focused on me. "Em, clean up your crayons." Immediately, she started picking up her crayons. Those simple words. "Look at me. Give me your attention. Focus." As soon as her eyes were on me, she was willing and happy to obey.

I haven't been so happy to obey lately. I heard God whisper, "Julie, look at me." Obedience is much easier when my focus and attention are on Him. When He has my attention, He has my heart too.

Turning my eyes,
Julie